A Tale of Three “Lucy”s – Lucy Three Is Moving!

A Tale of Three “Lucy”s – Lucy Three

You have probably heard from several sources to plan ahead when moving.  It’s never too early to start thinking about what to pack and how it will get to the new facility.  This past November, I was faced with three moves at the same time.  I will call my clients Lucy 1, Lucy 2 and Lucy 3. 

Lucy 1 lived in an apartment on the 15^th floor.  The view was wonderful, the space was large.  But there was this pesky little issue of persistent leaks that the property manager shrugged off as a small problem.  But mold growing under the carpet for years, and several trips to the hospital were hardly small issues for my client, retired from her teaching position.  It was time for a move.

Lucy 2 lived in a maintenance-free townhouse.  At 89 years old, her memory was failing and she had caregivers coming every day to help her dress and eat.  As her disease progressed, it became clear to the daughter that her mother needed someone watching her 24 hours/day. 

Lucy 3 lived in development specifically for residents over 55 years of age.  The homes were single family, but maintenance-free.  A widow, she lived there alone, but had children and grandchildren in the area to help.  She was able to drive, but when her multiple sclerosis and the weather got worse, she was unable to go outside.  She had to rely more and more on others, and began falling more frequently.  When she fell, she couldn’t get up on her own.  She decided to move to assisted living.

Over the next few posts, I will tell the stories of each of my clients and the unique challenges each faced. 

Here is the story of Lucy 3:

Bedroom 2 Before Staging

Lucy Three is a widow who moved from her lake home in Wisconsin to a senior community for residents 55 years of age and over.  It was ideal for her.  There was no maintenance, and she could keep her independence because she was still able to drive.  Several children lived nearby, as did grandchildren.  She was able to function quite well for years, driving herself to doctor appointments or the dentist.  But as her MS progressed, she began falling more.

The community had an alarm system for health emergencies, which Lucy was able to use.  But when the falls became more frequent, she decided she either had to get some help or move to assisted living.  After weighing her options, Lucy decided to move to assisted living.  

Once the decision was made, the family sprang into action under my direction.  Rooms were measured in the new apartment, and floor plans drawn to see what furniture could go with Lucy.  In addition to the furniture, Lucy had to choose which of her personal belongings she wanted to bring with, as it wouldn’t all fit in the new place.

The family then got together to pack what Lucy needed.  As they packed, they sorted through the rest of Lucy’s belongings, claiming what they wanted.  The family also took photos and posted them on Flickr so the children who lived out of state could select what they wanted. 

Bedroom 2 After Staging

In Lucy 3’s case, the family overpacked, boxing items up that could have been left out for staging.  Also, they used the spare bedroom as a holding place for anything Lucy wasn’t taking with her, and was available to the family.  That’s what I was faced with when I came in to stage the home.

Lucy moved the middle of November.  I was to start staging the home soon after, but a toilet sprang a leak, and flooded the house.  Luckily, it wasn’t anything that moving the furniture and professionally drying out the carpet couldn’t handle.  The water from the master bathroom didn’t go any farther than the main bedroom and part of the living room.  Then the carpet had to be re-stretched. 

I awaited word from the family for when the rooms were ready again.  They put the furniture back where it had been, then called me.  My job was to clean out the front bedroom, pack up the extras, and stage the home.  As I was packing, I put aside some items I knew the family did not claim.  I dropped off a load at Goodwill after clearing out the bedroom.  Items that were questionable with the family remained boxed up and stored in the closet.

Once the staging was done, I let the family know it was ready to list.  This was early February.  I had time to move on to the next project.  Not!  The home sold in ten days!  So back to work! 

Living Room After Staging

The next task was to completely empty the house.  That meant the family had to pick up everything they wanted.  And I had to find outlets for the rest.  I called a dealer, Bob, who buys collections, to see his interest in the Lladros, Madame Alexander Dolls, and Wedgwood Lucy Three was parting with.  I met him at the house on a Sunday morning.  While there, he gave me the name of an auction house in Chicago that might be interested in the furniture.  I took photos of the furniture and sent them to the auction house owner, Roger. 

Bob bought the Lladros, Wedgwood and the dolls. Roger made an offer on the furniture, and I arranged it so he could pick up Lucy 3’s furniture the same day as Lucy 2’s furniture.  It would save him a trip.  He not only loaded up the furniture, but took most of the other donations with him on the truck.  It saved me phone calls to charities, and trips to Goodwill. 

Once all the big pieces were out, the family came and picked up their items.  My next task was to clean out

Dining Room After Staging

the garage.  I packed up the last of the donations in my car and then swept it out.  Then I ran a vacuum cleaner through the rooms, dusted the baseboards, window sills and ceiling fans and took out the last of the garbage. 

I dropped off the key with Lucy Three so she could give it to her real estate agent.  The house closes in April. Another empty house! Another success! 

Next? 

Click here to see Lucy One's Story
Click here to see Lucy Two's Story

A Tale of Three “Lucy”s – Lucy Two Is Moving!

A Tale of Three “Lucy”s – Lucy Two

You have probably heard from several sources to plan ahead when moving.  It’s never too early to start thinking about what to pack and how it will get to the new facility.  This past November, I was faced with three moves at the same time.  I will call my clients Lucy 1, Lucy 2 and Lucy 3. 

Lucy 1 lived in an apartment on the 15^th floor.  The view was wonderful, the space was large.  But there was this pesky little issue of persistent leaks that the property manager shrugged off as a small problem.  But mold growing under the carpet for years, and several trips to the hospital were hardly small issues for my client, retired from her teaching position.  It was time for a move.

Lucy 2 lived in a maintenance-free townhouse.  At 89 years old, her memory was failing and she had caregivers coming every day to help her dress and eat.  As her disease progressed, it became clear to the daughter that her mother needed someone watching her 24 hours/day. 

Lucy 3 lived in development specifically for residents over 55 years of age.  The homes were single family, but maintenance-free.  A widow, she lived there alone, but had children and grandchildren in the area to help.  She was able to drive, but when her multiple sclerosis and the weather got worse, she was unable to go outside.  She had to rely more and more on others, and began falling more frequently.  When she fell, she couldn’t get up on her own.  She decided to move to assisted living.

Over the next few posts, I will tell the stories of each of my clients and the unique challenges each faced. 

Here is the story of Lucy 2:

Lucy Two lived in a maintenance-free townhouse.  Her daughter had recently taken her car keys away from her because her memory was failing and it wasn’t safe to have her on the roads.  She was 88 years old when I started visiting her a few times a week to take her to the grocery store, to get her hair done, etc.  All those things she couldn’t do herself because she wasn’t driving any more.

Dining Room Before Staging

Over the next few months, her health remained stable, but her memory was fading fast.  She would forget to eat.  She didn’t know night from day.  She thought her bedroom was her house, and the rest of her house was the office where she worked.  She soon needed assistance 7 days/week, and someone to visit her every night to make dinner.

This went on with a bevy of caretakers over several months.  Lucy began getting more confused.  She didn’t understand why people were coming over when she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.  She thought we were only visiting, and became belligerent when we tried to help.  After some serious episodes, her daughter, Lynn (the only child living in the area), decided to put her into Memory Care.

That decision was difficult enough for Lynn.  But then came the task of selling the townhouse.  It was full to the brim with family memories and loving knick-knacks – most of which Lucy couldn’t even remember how

Parlor Before Staging

she’d acquired.  The day of the move, November 1, Lynn and I took Lucy to her new rooms, stayed for lunch with her, then went home to pack up some belongings while Lucy attended mass at the facility.  We packed enough clothes for the winter months, and some personal effects, like photographs of the great-granddaughters she loved so much. 

The next step was to allow the family to claim what they wanted from the house.  Children came from out of state to pack up/claim what they wanted.  Then, with the help of the real estate agent, we selected those items that would stay in the house for staging.  I marked those items with painter’s tape.

Dining Room After Staging

A junk removal company, Ease Services, came to pick up the furniture we didn’t need for staging.  They took items in good condition to a charity.  Once the belongings were pared down, the entire house was painted and new carpet was installed.  Lynn had a handyman come and do some small cosmetic repairs.

I packed up the small items that we didn’t need for the showing, and with the help of Lucy’s daughter and grandson, the boxes got loaded and dropped off at a local donation center.  I used what was left to stage the house.  I brought in some accent pieces and colorful towels, and set the dining room table.  It looked like a warm, loving home.  

The house was listed on a Thursday.  By Saturday, it sold!  Yes, that quickly!  What did that mean?  The rest of the cabinets had to be emptied, and the furniture removed.  No rest here!  So the phone calls started again. 

Lynn had friends/family come in to take what they wanted/needed for themselves or children who were moving into their own apartments.  Lynn got estimates from moving companies for shipping her sibling’s items to her in Idaho.  Their brother drove up from Florida with a van to get his things.  Once we knew what was unclaimed, I finished emptying all the cabinets, garage, laundry room, etc., and boxed everything up for

Parlor After Staging

charity.

Ease Services came for a second load, taking the items we knew wouldn’t sell.  Then I called an auction house, who loaded up their truck the same day as Lucy Three's load, and paid Lucy Two for what they took away.  I finished cleaning out the garage, taking the garbage to the dumpster, and the last of the donations to Goodwill.  

The house was empty!!  The closing took place on March 28.  It was a real whirlwind of activity.  Thank goodness Lynn worked close to her mom’s house, so between the two of us, we were able to meet with drivers, repairmen, etc..  And although there were a few glitches, it all worked out in the end.  My final task was to mail some mementos we found in Lucy’s drawers to her daughter in Idaho and her grandson in Oregon. 

Lynn and I are going to dinner to celebrate! 

Click here to see Lucy One's Story
Click here to see Lucy Three's Story

Discard and Donate Before Moving

Moving on Monday

If you are planning to move soon, that means you are busy packing boxes and making last-minute arrangements.  You've called the moving company and made your reservation.  Like most movers, they charge by the hour.  So that means every box they take out, every piece of furniture, is on the clock.  So I ask you, do you want to pay them to move boxes you haven't opened for 20 years?  Do you want to pay them to move a bookcase that will probably end up in the garage? 

So doesn't it make sense to go through your belongings BEFORE you move? 

Start with big items.  Take a serious look at all your furniture.  Does it have a place in the new home?  Is it in good condition?  Will you have to replace it soon?  If you can do without it, then donate it.

As you pack for the move, do a quick evaluation of what you are putting in the boxes.  How many sets of sheets do you have?  How many do you need?  How many towels are you packing?  How about coffee mugs?  Do you really need every can cooler you received as giveaways at fairs or parades?  Think before packing everything.  Get rid of doubles, and throw away items that are broken or missing parts/pieces. 

Finally, open those boxes that have been sitting for years!  Chances are, if you haven't opened them in a while, you don't need what's inside them.  Donate it all for a tax deduction.

Move lighter!  Move cheaper!

Resources for Seniors

Senior Thursday

As a large part of the population continues to age, they require special services unique to the elderly. Some are a result of health issues, and some are monetary. They may find themselves unable to live in a two-story house because of navigating the stairs. If they already have a ranch home, then perhaps the yard is too much to maintain.

Some seniors can't perform simple personal tasks, such as bathing. So in addition to needing help with their home, they need help for themselves. Others may be healthy, but are struggling financially. In these cases, they need help paying for meds or paying bills.

So where do they find resources for assistance? They may need caregivers, medical advice, housing assistance, or information on laws protecting them. One place for both federal and state resources is USA.gov. This is a great start for many issues facing the elderly today, including raising grandchildren, something new to this generation of grandparents.

Local townships offer great resources also, as do hospitals. These resources include everything from free meal delivery to in-home nursing care. Don't be afraid to ask. Sometimes you can't do it all on your own.

Selecting a Moving Company

Moving on Monday

One of the most stressful parts about moving is finding a reliable moving company. Who can you trust to move your items safely, get the job done on time, and not overcharge you? How do you know the movers will be considerate of wood floors and newly painted walls?

If someone you know recently moved, ask them about their experience. If you don't know anyone, then there are sites like Movers Reviewed (www.moversreviewed.com) to help with your decision. Just put in your zip code, select the type of move/mover you want, and a list of companies will upload. For each listing, you can see their location, licenses, affiliations, size of fleet, etc.

Just click on a mover, and they will contact you for an estimate. As always, ask for references when they come out for a visit. Only trust references that have a name, address, and phone number for you to call.

Finally, once your move is over, go back to the web site and offer your review so others can benefit from your experience, good or bad.

Is Your Home Ready to Put on the Market?

Senior Thursday

As we age, our lives change. We've perhaps married and had children. We've raised those children, then sent them off to college and witnessed them marrying their childhood sweethearts. Suddenly, the homes we built to raise our families are empty. There are bedrooms that aren't being used, corners of the basement that are rarely seen, and large kitchen tables with empty seats.

If you are in retirement, your income has changed also. It probably isn't as high as when you were working. The cost of everything is going up, and funds are tight. So you decide to sell your home and move to more affordable housing.

But where do you start? You have a home filled with 30 years of memories. There are boxes packed away that you haven't seen in years. Some are yours, some are the kids. There are souvenirs from your trips, and prom dresses from high school.

Once you decide you are going to sell your home, the first thing you should do is de-clutter it. Get rid of all that excess.

It won't be easy. There will be some very difficult decisions about what you will bring to the new home, what you will give to the kids, and what will go to charity. There are memories attached to most, if not all, of the items. How can you throw away something from a family wedding or favorite vacation? You don't have to throw away everything. Keep those items that mean the most to you. If you want, take photos of the items you are getting rid of.

Just keep in mind that memories will always be with you, even after the item is gone. And what is important to you, isn't necessarily as important to the rest of your family.

Will Your Home Pass Inspection? Part Six

Moving on Mondays

Before you purchase a new home, you have an inspector look at it for any major problems. The results may be a deal breaker if the issues are serious enough. If you have your home for sale, put yourself in the buyer's shoes. What would they find on a home inspection of your property?

Avoid any surprises by having your own home inspection. These last weeks, we looked at storage spaces and possible fire hazards. This week, we'll look at potential water disaster areas--your bathrooms.

Bathroom
• Do toilets flush properly?
• Do toilets show signs of leaking?
• Is the sink area/under dry?
• Is the sink top attached firmly to the vanity?
• Do the tiles in the tub/shower area need repair?
• Are the walls damaged from moisture or water?
• Is the whirlpool tub working properly?
• Do the pipes show signs of leakage?
• Does the ventilation fan work?
• Is the room equipped with a GFCI outlet?

Profile of a Hoarder

Senior Thursday

The following characteristics are what experts believe define hoarders. Although there are hoarding situations that defy each of these characteristics, and they are also common.

Hoarders are typically:
• Female; unmarried
• Living alone; socially isolated
• Related to other hoarders
• Suffering from anxiety, depression and/or personality disorder
• Lacking insight into the problem or in denial
• More entrenched in hoarding as they age

HOW COMMON IS HOARDING?
It is estimated that slightly less than 1% of the population hoards. (Note: One percent of the U.S. population represents approximately three million people.)

However, hoarding is a very private disease and in all likelihood, is under reported. Researchers believe that fewer than 5% of hoarders ever come to the attention of authorities.

Will Your Home Pass Inspection? Part Five

Moving on Mondays

Before you purchase a new home, you have an inspector look at it for any major problems. The results may be a deal breaker if the issues are serious enough. If you have your home for sale, put yourself in the buyer's shoes. What would they find on a home inspection of your property?

Avoid any surprises by having your own home inspection. These last weeks, we looked at storage spaces This week, we'll look at fire-hazard areas--the fireplace and laundry room.

Fireplaces
• Have the fireplace and chimney been cleaned recently?
• Is the masonry missing cement or mortar?
• Is the flue clear?
• Does the damper operate properly?

The Laundry Room
• Are appliances properly ventilated?
• Are vents clear of lint and debris?
• Is the wiring correct for the appliances?
• Are there signs of leaks from appliances?

Will Your Home Pass Inspection?--Part Four

Moving on Monday

Before you purchase a new home, you have an inspector look at it for any major problems. The results may be a deal breaker if the issues are serious enough. If you have your home for sale, put yourself in the buyer's shoes. What would they find on a home inspection of your property?

Avoid any surprises by having your own home inspection. Last week, we had a checklist of things to look for in the attic. This week, we're looking at another storage space--your basement.

• Do walls show signs of seepage or past water damage?
• Are there cracks in the foundation?
• Is there rot in the woodwork?
• Is the electricity up to code?
• Are there signs of leakage from plumbing?
• Are basement windows operational? Broken?
• Do the stairs to the basement have a railing?
• Are stairs uneven/of equal height?
• Are there signs of pest or rodent infestation?
• Are there signs of water leakage from upper floors?
• Is the insulation adequate?
• Are there holes where the foundation meets the walls?
• Is the sump pump operational?
• Does the sump pump have battery back-up?

Causes of Hoarding

Senior Thursday

While it is not always known exactly what makes seniors begin to hoard, there are some disorders that contribute to the disease.

1. Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) Experts believe that the most common cause of hoarding is OCD. Approximately 3% of the general population has OCD. However, most of these individuals are not hoarders. Individuals may exhibit mild, moderate or significant symptoms with this disorder.
There are four subtypes of OCD:
• Pure obsessions
• Contamination and checking
• Symmetry/ordering/arranging
• Hoarding/saving/collecting
Hoarders engage in saving/collecting behavior in order to combat obsessive doubts and anxiety-provoking thoughts. Most hoarders experience intense anxiety or distress when attempting to discard what others may view as useless objects.
2. Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) Adult ADHD—the inability to focus or control impulses—often contributes to hoarding. Like OCD, many people who hoard have ADHD, but most individuals with ADHD are not hoarders.
3. Psychosis Individuals with paranoid schizophrenia and bipolar disorder are often hoarders. However, most hoarders do not have schizophrenia or bipolar disorder.
4. Dementia Approximately 20% of people with dementia exhibit some degree of hoarding behavior. Hoarding is common in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease, as individuals attempt to keep things in sight for fear of forgetting where they are. As the disease progresses, hoarding behavior may increase as individuals seek to gather together familiar objects. Most hoarders do not have dementia.

Will Your Home Pass Inspection?--Part Three

Moving on Monday

Before you purchase a new home, you have an inspector look at it for any major problems. The results may be a deal breaker if the issues are serious enough. If you have your home for sale, put yourself in the buyer's shoes. What would they find on a home inspection of your property?

Avoid any surprises by having your own home inspection. These past weeks, we've had a checklist of things to look for outside your home. These next few weeks we'll look at the inside. Here's what to look for when inspecting your attic.

• Is the insulation good enough for weather conditions? The more extreme the temperatures, the more insulation you should have.
• Are there signs of rodent infestation? Find their nests and their point of entry.
• Is there proper ventilation? The presence of moisture indicates a problem.
• Are there signs of water leakage on the boards or trusses?
• Is the electrical wiring safe?
• Is the electrical wiring away from insulation and other hazards?
• Do any of the boards have cracks, or do they sag?
• Are access stairs in good condition?

Hoarding and the Elderly

Senior Thursday

WHAT IS HOARDING?

Hoarding is the name given to behavior that is characterized by:
• The acquisition and failure to discard a large number of possessions that are useless or of limited value
• The accumulation of belongings to such a degree that they impact functioning and/or preclude the activity for which the space was designed; for example-- a bed cannot be slept upon or a tub cannot be used for bathing because they are used for storage
• When the quantity of items creates a potential hazard or puts people at risk

Hoarding does not begin suddenly. It takes years for items to accumulate to such a degree that they constitute hoarding. Some believe that hoarding increases among older adults as compensation for accumulated human losses. Others believe that hoarding only seems to be a bigger problem among the elderly because they have had more time to accumulate. As more and more cases of extreme hoarding in older adults come to light, hoarding among the elderly is being recognized as a significant problem.

Hoarding becomes a greater problem as individuals age. Floors in hoarders’ homes are normally covered with debris, and as balance and mobility decrease, the hoarded belongings become a significant risk factor for falls.

Most older adults have multiple chronic conditions that are impacted by hoarding as well. Medication compliance among hoarders is poor because pill containers get lost under mounds of clutter and pulmonary conditions are exacerbated by the dust. Frail older adults may be unable to receive needed assistance because most home care agencies will not provide services in hoarding situations until the unsafe conditions are remedied.

If you know an elderly person living under these conditions, call Prima ByDesign, Inc. (847-955-1822.) We can help declutter the senior's home, and perform a Senior Safety Home Assessment. Help prevent accidents.

Will Your Home Pass Inspection?--Part Two

Moving On Monday

Before you purchase a new home, you have an inspector look at it for any major problems. The results may be a deal breaker if the issues are serious enough. If you have your home for sale, put yourself in the buyer's shoes. What would they find on a home inspection of your property?

Avoid any surprises by having your own home inspection. The next few weeks will be a checklist of things to look for around your home. Here's what to look at when inspecting the exterior of your home.

Garage
• Is the driveway cracked or uneven?
• Are doors and windows rotted or peeling?
• Is there fire protection between house and garage?
• Is there fire protection between house and garage?
• Does the garage door opener/safety mechanism work?
• Is the floor cracked? Clean?

Landscaping
• Are trees and shrubs clear/trimmed from the house?
• Are large trees far enough from the house that they don't pose threat to foundation?
• Are trees and shrubs trimmed to allow clear view of road?
• Are trees and shrubs clear from walkways and entryway?
• Does land grade away from house for proper drainage?

The Principles of Sorting--Part Five

Senior Thursday

Everyone's family will face the time when they must sort through the belongings of senior family members or aging parents. This may be as a result of a move to assisted living, or upon the senior's passing. If the senior is still alive, the decisions are more difficult, whether the move is to a retirement community or a nursing home. In most cases, the new home is smaller, and thus, many of their possessions can't go with them.

Another core principle of sorting is “first things first.” Know your goals before you begin sorting. Identify what needs to be done first. Do personal artifacts need to be removed before an Estate Sale? Do essentials need to be packed for a new home? Do any pieces of furniture need emptying before a family member takes them? Does the house need to be readied for the market? Look at your priorities and address them accordingly.

Some seniors use sorting to postpone the move. They worry about what will happen to each item, so they postpone the decisions so they can postpone the move. However, they should rather focus on what is going with them to their new home. If time and finances allow, go ahead and complete the move with the necessities, then return to the old home to sort what is left to get the process moving.

The Principles of Sorting--Part Four

Senior Thursday

Everyone's family will face the time when they must sort through the belongings of senior family members or aging parents. This may be as a result of a move to assisted living, or upon the senior's passing. If the senior is still alive, the decisions are more difficult, whether the move is to a retirement community or a nursing home. In most cases, the new home is smaller, and thus, many of their possessions can't go with them.

The fourth core principle of sorting is to listen. Respectful listening, though it may seem like wasting time is one of the most important things you can do when helping a senior sort their belongings. Ask questions, make comments. They will love talking to you about their past. You can learn a great deal about the senior while sorting.

Sorting can be intense and draining both physically and emotionally. Attention span for most seniors is 2-3 hours. For some, it is shorter, so keep sessions brief. One and one half to two hours is sufficient, depending on needs. Encourage breaks and snacks. You can do other tasks in the meantime, like packing away what they will be moving.

The Principles of Sorting--Part Three

Senior Thursday

Everyone's family will face the time when they must sort through the belongings of senior family members or aging parents. This may be as a result of a move to assisted living, or upon the senior's passing. If the senior is still alive, the decisions are more difficult, whether the move is to a retirement community or a nursing home. In most cases, the new home is smaller, and thus, many of their possessions can't go with them.

The third core principle of sorting is understanding the meaning of “things.” There are numerous emotional issues around the sorting process. For some clients, letting go of belongings feels like one more loss on top of many others. They feel like they are losing part of themselves. When helping a senior with these decisions, you should see their possessions as more than “things.” They are part of their lives.

Seemingly insignificant items may have great sentimental value or emotional value, even if broken. Don’t refer to it as “junk.” Cherished possessions can trigger memories of a deceased spouse or child. These memories help preserve a sense of continuity of themselves and of their personal identity. Even the most mundane objects can be cherished possessions.

Many seniors find that telling stories about an object helps them part with it. Stories make them realize they can take memories with them without having to keep the object.

The Principles of Sorting--Part Two

Senior Thursday

Everyone's family will face the time when they must sort through the belongings of senior family members or aging parents. This may be as a result of a move to assisted living, or upon the senior's passing. If the senior is still alive, the decisions are more difficult, whether the move is to a retirement community or a nursing home. In most cases, the new home is smaller, and thus, many of their possessions can't go with them.

The second core principle of sorting is to avoid imposing personal values on the family member's lifestyle or belongings.

Some individuals are comfortable with more clutter. Some are minimalists. Neither is right or wrong. Your role is to help the family member create a new home that works for him or her, not for you.

Sorting is not about identifying the most valuable or newest items. It is about what is most dear. Encourage clients to use what they enjoy most.

The Principles of Sorting--Part One

Senior Thursday

Everyone's family will face the time when they must sort through the belongings of senior family members or aging parents. This may be as a result of a move to assisted living, or upon the senior's passing. If the senior is still alive, the decisions are more difficult, whether the move is to a retirement community or a nursing home. In most cases, the new home is smaller, and thus, many of their possessions can't go with them.

Downsizing, right-sizing, and sorting all refer to helping seniors determine which belongings can be accommodated in their new home. For some, the prospect of sorting is so daunting they postpone moving. For others, the anxiety about the move itself takes on the form of indecision about belongings. Family dynamics may complicate this.

Organizing in advance and documenting decisions is a critical ingredient of smooth, efficient moves. This should be done before moving day for the least stress. Even when sorting is done in advance, the senior may take too much with them, resulting in over-crowding. A senior is less likely to be happy in their new home as a result. That is why sorting in advance is critical.

Remember these are the senior’s belongings, not yours. They have a right to make their own decisions, even if they are irrational. When helping a senior, provide what help and guidance you can, but don't interfere with their right to self-determination.

It is the client’s right to take as much or as little to their new home as they wish. This is the core principle of sorting.

Moving to a Smaller Home

Moving on Monday

One of the biggest challenges when moving occurs when your new home is smaller than your current home. Or, you are combining two fully-furnished homes into one. The reality is, not everything will fit into the new home. So you must decide which items you are keeping, and those you aren't.

The best time to decide this is BEFORE you move. Why pay the movers to move furniture you won't be keeping? But how do you decide what to keep, and what to get rid of?

First, take inventory of what you own. Indicate which items you definitely need, such as a bed and dresser for each family member, and a set of dishes for everyday use. After deciding what you need, mark off those things you would like to bring to the new home if it fits--your preferred items. You'll see what's left on your list are things that you can probably do without. For example, you need a dresser for each room, and would like to bring your grandmother's antique chest to hold linens in the master bedroom. But that old dresser from college really isn't needed by anyone, and is in pretty bad shape, anyway.

Next, make a rough floor plan of your new home. Go back to the house and take photos, if necessary. You'll want to know where doors, windows, outlets and air vents are. Draw in the furniture that will fit into each room. If you have more than one sofa that can be considered for the family room, measure the space, then measure the sofas. Which would fit best, along with tables and a comfy chair? If both are similar in size, which do you like better? Which is newer? Which will wear better over time with your family? For example, the leather sofa is comfy and would look great with the stone fireplace. But will it really be best for small children and two dogs in a combined household?

After placing your "necessary" and "preferred" items into the floor plan, see if there will still be room in the house for any of your other items. Consider closets, pantry, basement, garage and attic. That's not to say you should feel the need to fill every available space. But if there are items that would be nice to keep and you have room, then by all means, keep them.

Whatever doesn't fit into the home can be given to friends and relatives, or donated. You pay the movers by the pound/hour. Don't pay them to move things you can't put in the new home.